When people talk to me about the life they are living I often hear the tones of desperation in their voice and general frustration in their inability to change the course of the life they are living. They may feel trapped in a sensitive family matter, an unfulfilling career, or the constant rollercoaster ride of an emotionally toxic relationship. They soon have self-doubts about who they are and if they can change the situation.
We all experience these imbalances, disruptions to our vision of the good around us and even the good we do for others. So we accept the good and the bad as a norm, modify our own expectations, take a left turn, adapt and survive. We keep turning left at every bump because that is what we know. Once you do it a couple of times you decide that it’s not too bad, you made it – right? You survived the hurt. That is what we do as humans, adapt and survive, because we know that space, we know the good, the hurtful and the effect on our mental health but we turn left anyway. It is known, it is sometimes predictable, but what it is not, is change.
Change itself can be disruptive. Right turns lead to unexplored spaces, the unknown. As domesticated humans we want boundaries, we want instructions to the rules of the space. How we will be perceived if we act ourselves. What will we be rewarded for and punished for in this new place? We want to know how to adapt and survive. In reality, these new spaces are an empty canvas awaiting the instruction of the life that you are about to build. You set the rules of engagement for the people that bring you disappointment and those that bring joy. You set the rules for the career you want. You set the rules of your life and if you don’t, someone else will.
It all sounds pretty simple but in fact, both are challenging. A lack of resources, family support, or a whole range of other issues can create obstacles to moving on. Taking the right-hand turn is a bit like jumping out of a window hoping you can figure out your landing before you hit. If you are stuck, some planning and determination could help muster resources and support to allow you to change course. If you take the right turn, planning might allow you to pull the cord in airspace that you want to operate in. If that doesn’t work you may feel the impact of the ground, but so what, you already know how to adapt and survive.